Make your child feel valued without spending a lot

By Wendy Thomas

Kids are expensive. There is no getting around that. A large part of the expense is that we want only the best for our kids and we want to make sure they have every opportunity. This is the reason why we buy them virtually every toy on the market in the area that fascinates them (Power Rangers or dinosaurs anyone?), top athletic equipment, and go all out on birthdays and celebrations.

We want our kids to know how much we value them.

But will wearing expensive soccer shoes make the difference when they think back over their childhood? And if so, how on earth can we continue doing that when money has become so tight for so many families?

The short answer is that we can't. In a time when some families can't even afford to buy the lesson books needed for band, we need to rethink how we show our kids that we care.

Because we have so many kids in our family and money is always an issue, I have always tried to create mini-celebrations that don't cost much but get the kids to look forward to an event. I don't end up spending a lot of money; it's the consistency and creativity with a dose of planning that make these special events work.

• On Christmas morning, Santa leaves a candy cane bouquet on the kids' bedroom door proving to them he visited the house.
• On the day before school, we have a practice party where the kids get up at 6 a.m. to have a full, hot breakfast and receive their school supplies needed for the next day.
• In the Fall, if you catch a falling leaf before it hits the ground and put it under your pillow, the Fall Fairy comes and leaves you a pair of warm socks for the coming cold months.
• The Easter Bunny creates a scavenger hunt, sending the kids all over the house and yard before they finally get to find their Easter Baskets.
• On Fat Tuesday, in celebration of Mardi Gras, for dessert we all ate a giant filled doughnut.
• My older kids still talk about the fact that I read the first five books of Harry Potter out loud to them after dinners. “Just one more chapter” and not “Can I watch a movie?” became the nightly plea.
• During evening dinners we go around the table to hear everyone's answer to, “What did you learn today?”

With a little bit of creativity and fun, you can still show your kids you value them without spending a lot of money. When my kids think back on growing up in our house, it's not going to be the toys they got for their birthday that they'll remember (go ahead and quiz your child on what he got for his birthday last year and you'll see what I mean.) It is the childhood magic and the moments where we slowed down enough to spend time with them that are going to become their favorite childhood memories.

Wendy Thomas lives in Merrimack with her husband and six children, and has been published in various regional magazines and newspapers. Check out her blog, Simple Thrift-Creative Living on Less, at http://simplethrift.wordpress.com.